Pregnancy… As easy as 1, 2, 3?
Your pregnant! How exciting, and for women the most natural thing in the world. It’s as easy as snapping your fingers and counting 1,2,3! This may be the tale for some, and yet not for others.
As a girl growing up in the 80’s, I think back on all the opportunities open to me. The logical order was that I would finish high school, move on to college and then a job I loved. Marriage and the baby carriage would soon follow! In fact, it did go that way, only a lot later than I had anticipated. My first baby arrived when I was 37 and my second baby when I was one month shy of 40.
It never occurred to me that I wouldn’t have babies. However, it became evident that pregnancy was not as easy as it seemed. When I decided it was time to have my babies, pregnancy was a frequent topic. It was only through conversations with coworkers and friends, that I became cognizant of the infertility epidemic.
Pregnancy Statistics Canada
Now, using the word epidemic can be dramatic, and yet the numbers do not lie. Statistics Canada Reported that 16% or 1 in 6 couples experience infertility. Furthermore, this statistic has doubled since the 1980’s. So, getting pregnant is not always as easy as snapping your fingers, and counting 1, 2, 3!
I was extremely fortunate to have very little stress when I set out to become a mother. Yet, many of my colleagues, a close friend and my niece have struggled. To clarify, I was able to see the pain of such a burden on those close to me. The pain of how badly they wanted to be mother, and not be able to manifest it radiated.
Even in my own family…
The challenge of infertility has reared its ugly head even in my own family. Thinking quietly to myself, I remember my niece. It was only last Christmas I sat directly across the table from her. Placing my hand on her palm, I told her I was thinking of her. I could feel her pain, and the angst of what she was missing.
We had a heart to heart conversation of the heavy burden she carried. She had been trying for 3 long years to conceive and nothing was working. Our discussion centered on how taxing the journey was. Not to mention, being let down each month only go through more grief and pain. At this point, she mentioned that they were on a wait list for In Vitro Fertilization (IVF).
Seems like an easy fix!
Seems like an easy fix, doesn’t it? If only it were that simple and effortless. My goal as an aunt was to:
- Give love
- Be supportive
- Lend an unbiased ear when needed
- Offer any of my tools or resources when asked
Other than what I mentioned above, what else could I do? I am woman who is a “fixer”. I get right to the root of an issue, straight into problem solving mode. Unfortunately, this was not a problem I could personally solve.
Practical advice…
Pain is a challenging place to be, in fact it is a sign to pay attention. Paying attention to how you are feeling, and the thoughts circulating in your mind is important. For instance, I asked my niece to close her eyes and place her arms out in front of me. As she did this we sat quietly, and I asked her to see and feel her baby in her arms. This daily exercise was important for her to complete. Why so? It kept her focused on being pregnant and NOT on the absence of it.
What we focus on is extremely important. In fact, focus on what you want even if you do not have it right now. Fake it till you make it! You might be thinking “I can’t be fake” and yet you’ve done it before.
Let’s think back…
As children we played with vivid imaginations. We believed ourselves to be a princess or a knight, that we could fly or drive and so on. Children are happy playing in their imagination. They believe what they see, and how they see themselves.
Thoughts and feelings are evidence markers. Thinking with a mindset of lack, pain and grief will bring more pain and grief. So, this is where imagination comes into play. Imagining how you want things to be, will move you step by step to the positive side. So, take a moment each day, and use the power of your imagination. Start with small steps and build on it. You will be surprised how quickly your mindset can change.
Guess what? She’s Pregnant!
This summer I received the most wonderful news! After 3 long years my niece announced her pregnancy. As a family we are so excited to have this little one soon, show case her grand entrance. I have fondly named her Baby Princess G.
As a Hypnotherapist, I have had the pleasure of guiding women to prepare for their labor and delivery. My niece asked if I would be willing to provide Hypnosis for her labor and delivery. Of course, my only answer was YES! It is my honor.
What are the next steps when preparing for labor and delivery while in trance? Stay connected! More to come as we prepare for Baby Princess G to arrive safely, and for her Mama to have an easy and effortless labor.
